You don't know Jack (#3)

Like all toddlers, Jackson provides the occasional nuggets of observation or wisdom or humor. These are generally unprompted, often silly or nonsensical, and usually come out of the blue with no context. Here are some recent ones:

He'll eat a bowl of mussels by himself.

• "I have a booger. I put it right there."

• "Get off the seat. You're too big and too old. {Pause.} Dad, can you get up?"

• "Mommy, I don't like those options."

• Jack:   "I love Monkey so, so much!"

         Brian:  "I love you so, so much."

         Jack:   "Yeah. Sorry about that. Excellent work. Keep going."

• "I'm NOT going to throw Rudolph's head at the television."

• Upon being told Daddy was still asleep at 5:30 am: "I will be quiet. And I will not breathe fire or roar."

Driving in the Transport Museum in Glasgow.

• Kate:  "Isn't Mommy awesome?"

         Jack:  "No. Daddy is awesome."

         Kate:  "What am I?"

         Jack:  "A doctor."

• What do you want to be when you grow up?  "Gonzo!"

• "Daddy, you're so very cute. Just like me!"

• Kate: "Mmmm, you smell good."

         Jack: "Yes, mom. I do."

• Intentionally throws Mattie's ball over the fence. Puts his hand on her head. Looks deeply into her eyes: "I'm sorry. It was not my fault."

• "Go have a beer, Mommy and Daddy. Please. Go have a beer, and then come back and get me. Please."

• "Daddy, this is awkward."

Speaking of awkward... Where are your pants? How did you get the seasoned salt? What happened to the glasses? What's up with the duckface?